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Does anyone actually like going on first dates?

It’s like going into the great unknown. You have no idea what to expect. You’re nervous about what she’s going to be like. You’re nervous about how you’re going look. You’re nervous about how to end the night. There’s just so much to stress about because so many things could go wrong.

But to make things a little easier for you, there are some things that you don’t have to think too hard about — and those are the automatic first-date deal-breakers. These are the things to look for that will tell you whether this has a chance of going anywhere:

Bad breath

She’s boring as hell

She talks way too much and doesn’t let you get a word in

There’s something very unsexy about her — like she has a firm handshake or an ear-wrenching voice

She’s mean to the waitress

She reveals information about herself that tells you she won’t be a good girlfriend

She reveals a little too much about herself, like she’s into some weird stuff or is insanely obsessive-compulsive